tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23328871294788888512024-03-13T17:47:43.674-04:00Blast Shields DownMatthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13525367892735017144noreply@blogger.comBlogger264125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2332887129478888851.post-81300522485605690302010-08-04T13:32:00.001-04:002010-08-04T13:36:02.897-04:00The Pension Grillparzer, OH<object type="application/x-shockwave-flash" data="https://clients4.google.com/voice/embed/embedPlayer" width="100%" height="64"><param name="movie" value="https://clients4.google.com/voice/embed/embedPlayer" /><param name="wmode" value="transparent" /><param name="FlashVars" value="u=10556861151183968069&k=AHwOX_CYd7FEPKkZW5c2LkEglVr87X31hJtbhixyT0cGQOPH5BEi3pJtC0Gdm6yWD9_EknH3nBqRrCjl9sH1qBvU5jLz2DHBgwTAK_ZdnpGxncYqL-2xf_bum9avVL9SgYo4wXm9NVxRKPliwanxGX70yOYxD37qcKJLvKn3R7EkC9O-on-9MEY&baseurl=https://clients4.google.com/voice&autoPlay=false&cap=The%20World%20According%20to%20Matt" /></object>Calebhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03791855070147228790noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2332887129478888851.post-14592892551314234162010-07-23T00:00:00.001-04:002010-07-23T00:43:17.082-04:00I'm Not the Man They Think I Am at HomeI've always been a fan of bizarro stuff. Matt and I even spent a year living as a bizarro version of our best friend. I like that, as far as Bizarro Superman is concerned, being bizarro is about not just being the evil version of the original, but also the reverse and opposite of it too. One of my favorite superhero characters is Zibarro, the bizarro version of Bizarro Superman. And he isn't Superman, but he is close. <br /><br />Although I like bizarrity I don't think I could bring myself to read any bizarro fiction. I'm just not that kind of reader. Not that there is anything wrong with bizarro fiction, I'm just a little more somber, serious, and sterile I suppose in my reading selections. I always have to tell people, it isn't that I think comedic writing isn't good, it can be great, I'm just not a very funny reader. <br /><br />But I have to admit that the new book Shatnerquake by bizarro fiction author Jeff Burk looks pretty amazing. Here's what Amazon has to say about it~<br /><br />" William Shatner? William Shatner. WILLIAM SHATNER!!! It's the first ShatnerCon with William Shatner as the guest of honor! But after a failed terrorist attack by Campbellians, a crazy terrorist cult that worships Bruce Campbell, all of the characters ever played by William Shatner are suddenly sucked into our world. Their mission: hunt down and destroy the real William Shatner.<br /><br />Featuring: Captain Kirk, TJ Hooker, Denny Crane, Rescue 911 Shatner, Singer Shatner, Shakespearean Shatner, Twilight Zone Shatner, Cartoon Kirk, Esperanto Shatner, Priceline Shatner, SNL Shatner, and - of course - William Shatner! "<br /><br />I know right?! I'm not going to lie, I don't have much to say besides that, because really, what else can be said. <br /><br /><object width="480" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/NN3MGN899yE&hl=en_US&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/NN3MGN899yE&hl=en_US&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object>Calebhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03791855070147228790noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2332887129478888851.post-62727025259867868062010-07-16T14:39:00.002-04:002010-07-16T14:42:59.996-04:00Destiny Hope is a Stripper's Name<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibBqCezQxKE8uzCFfcl1TL-d47dbDAxTk0mGDHRN6sEg7soFM2OZwjtvzglMVRw8BK5fFiR3LAw1fb30D4abc2M_hYbLUp4j8LapTsy0OTBdgjxfcE6zyneUnMbOTGmlzQILarc6H35rY/s1600/Screenshot_2.png"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 176px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibBqCezQxKE8uzCFfcl1TL-d47dbDAxTk0mGDHRN6sEg7soFM2OZwjtvzglMVRw8BK5fFiR3LAw1fb30D4abc2M_hYbLUp4j8LapTsy0OTBdgjxfcE6zyneUnMbOTGmlzQILarc6H35rY/s400/Screenshot_2.png" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5494576377736902466" /></a><br />Left: Destiny, a stripper from the HBO series True Blood. Right: Destiny Hope Cyrus (A.K.A. Miley Cyrus.)Calebhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03791855070147228790noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2332887129478888851.post-47812129660160277352010-06-03T13:20:00.001-04:002010-06-03T13:21:53.520-04:00Summer Reading<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgexR5e10JyyOfj4By2CtLOadltohXX_CzqBt8Kn3LWJLbbNB2EX9wSmN-0R2mG6kCz7HG-OtdQ4ebfd1MQnny3AkGmg9Wb-MG2u42JNdI4bFLz9Ooj8L5R1oC44ctw68WY8CxXzCGBKxo/s1600/1275459384867.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 265px; height: 396px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgexR5e10JyyOfj4By2CtLOadltohXX_CzqBt8Kn3LWJLbbNB2EX9wSmN-0R2mG6kCz7HG-OtdQ4ebfd1MQnny3AkGmg9Wb-MG2u42JNdI4bFLz9Ooj8L5R1oC44ctw68WY8CxXzCGBKxo/s400/1275459384867.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5478598760916711826" /></a>Calebhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03791855070147228790noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2332887129478888851.post-40772172971402359762010-05-20T17:23:00.000-04:002010-05-20T17:23:13.057-04:00Categorically OpposedI used to be a fan of genres. Science fiction, fantasy, gothic... but not westerns, no definitely not westerns. I spent countless hours of my youth reading Star Wars novels. I just chewed through them. Some of them were good, some of them woefully mediocre, and some beyond bad. But, I read them because of the name on the front, not for any other reason. It was a trap, one I think far too many people fall into. For in the last few years, I've slowly come to realize the truth: genres suck.<br /><br />Yes, they can be helpful. There are differences between genres and specifics to each that lead some to gravitate towards certain ones and others to shy away from them. I am a sci-fi fan, there is no doubt about it, but I don't like the vast majority of science fiction books. Several Hugo and Nebula winning books that I have read recently have disappointed me. Others are some of my favorites. What it comes down to is a sense of exploration and newness that science fiction has. It is that idea of a blank slate, of endless possibilities. Truly great sci-fi creates a sense of wonderment that is beyond compare. But, that doesn't mean other genres cannot do the same thing, or invoke different joys in a reader or viewer. Even, explaining why I love science fiction limits the genre, because not all, or even most sci-fi elicits that sort of feeling in me. Just some, and others of my favorite science fiction do no such thing.<br /><br />So, genres are a nice indicator of certain themes that one might think to expect in a piece of art, but they are frighteningly problematic. When they confine us into little regions of fiction, they are only hindering our enjoyment. For far too long I avoided westerns for whatever reason, but No Country for Old Men was a great movie, and Deadwood is one of the best TV shows I have ever seen. And that only leads me to the question of what a western even is. Do they have to take place in the western United States during the 19th Century or is it specific themes which form a genre? What about The Gunslinger by Stephen King? Is it a western or fantasy? What genre is Firefly?<br /><br />Even my esteemed colleague here at BSD has been mutilated by this stealthy succubus, claiming he dislikes anime. While, I cannot claim to be all that well-versed in the genre, Spirited Away and Kiki's Delivery Service were wonderful movies and if cinematic Japanese video games count, well... those are some of my favorites. While I may not delve into some genres enough, I have abandoned claiming not to like genres. Genre-ism simply is not helpful. Romance, Mystery, Alternate History, Slasher Films... I can name a book or movie I have enjoyed from most any genre that I can think of. Military? Saving Private Ryan. Romantic Comedy... Groundhog Day (or is that sci-fi too?). Alternate History... The Man in the High Castle. Mystery? Sherlock Holmes. The the only real criteria I have is whether or not it's any good. Isn't that what matters? Just take a step back, do yourself a favor, and do just a little delving. Find something that sounds interesting or is supposed to be great from a genre you thought you hated and let yourself experience something new. Because, really... aren't we all violating the true spirit of that old cliche... aren't we just judging books by their covers?<br /><br />While these thoughts have been floating around in my head for a while now, what really inspired me to write this (though it has taken me far too long to actually get my thoughts down) was an <a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/books/2009/aug/29/margaret-atwood-year-of-flood">article</a> in The Guardian by Ursula K. Le Guin late last year. It is ostensibly a review of Margaret Atwood's latest book, The Year of the Flood, but to me read more like a critic of the publishing industry in general and genres in particular. I won't rehash it completely, but in short: Atwood argues she doesn't write science fiction, while Le Guin can't blame her for not wanting to be relegated to "genre fiction", but doesn't agree. Neither do I, to tell the truth and the whole ordeal is a sad state of affairs. I don't believe anything should be called "genre fiction", or maybe everything should be, but either way the title is meaningless. Everything fits into some genre or another, or two, or three or seventeen. You can fit it into some category that will help it reach it's audience, but ultimately it only restricts it. I understand that The Year of the Flood is much better than the average sci-fi novel out there (or would imagine it is, not having read it, but having thoroughly enjoyed Atwood's novels The Handmaid's Tale and Oryx and Crake), but it is also much better than the average novel period. Call it speculative fiction or future fiction or post-apocalyptic-dystopian-geneticism... just call it something that is helpful. Because, despite how much I am railing against genres, they are useful if used as descriptors. I like to know a little bit about what I am going to read before I read it. The problem is that genres are limiting us, not helping. Give me the genre and then tell me if it's any good or not and we are set. It's the latter that really matters.<br /><br />Despite how much I love thrill of the hunt for used books, there are simply too many to sift through by myself. Which is why I rely on reviews and lists, word of mouth and advertisements on the back of milk cartons to decide what I should read. I search for used books all over the place, but I try not to allow myself to be biased by the genre in my searches. Library book sales are unmatched for book hunting, for the simple fact that you can load up on a bunch of books you didn't realize you needed or wanted for only a few bucks, but they are always so hectic. The internet is obviously the most convenient route, but it has it's drawbacks, too. First, you never really know what you're getting... condition, smell, delivery time, all unknowns and I dislike paying a cent for a book and $3.99 for shipping. Ultimately, though, it just feels like cheating. I would much rather have the thrill of finding the book somewhere than giving in and ordering it off of Amazon. So used book stores are without a doubt my favorite. You simply cannot beat the ambiance and smell of them. Recently, I was even a bit disappointed when my favorite store fixed the light over the sci-fi section... I preferred the dimness. Yet even there, in my sanctuary is the horror of genre. Sci-fi, fantasy... mysteries, westerns, romance.... and, worst of all "literature".<br /><br />Yet, if I am going to be honest, the demarcation is helpful. I avoid the romance completely, not from an aversion to love, but with the the knowledge that anything in that section is going to be dreck. If I'm going to invest the hours it takes to read a book, it's not going to be for smut. That's what porn is for. The well-written love stories are in the normal fiction section anyway, because apparently a criteria for the romance genre is that it must be bad. Which, I don't get at all. If we're going to make these categories, shouldn't we stick with them? Shouldn't 1984 be in Science Fiction? Or All Quiet on the Western Front in historical novels? Or is that not historical because it was written only ten years after the war? I don't even know the rules on these things. But no, those two aren't even in normal fiction, no... they have been exalted to the "literature" section, not that I really know what that means.<br /><br />Yet, again... I can't say this division doesn't help me. I am a book elitist and much of what I read comes from stuff that would be termed "literature", though from the narrow way the used book stores describe it, nothing written in the last half-century counts. But, literature is not a genre and is far greater than the two shelves worth of Dickens, Hardy, Austen and Sinclair Lewis in the corner of the store. Literature is no more and no less than the art of the written word. As impossible to define as I know that is.<br /><br />So, I will continue reading literature, which really amounts to anything that is well-written enough to keep my attention, no matter the genre. If you'd like to keep reading uninspired, bland fiction, be my guest, just maybe think about trying a bad sci-fi book or a bad western once in a while. It might surprise you.Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13525367892735017144noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2332887129478888851.post-69111815573906809422010-05-13T13:41:00.003-04:002010-05-13T13:41:00.111-04:00Sodom and Gomorrah"Now Lot went up out of Zoar and settled in the hills with his two daughters, for he was afraid to stay in Zoar; so he lived in a cave with his two daughters. And the firstborn said to the younger, "Our father is old, and there is not a man on earth to come in to use after the manner of all the world. Come, let us make out father drink wine, and we will lie with him, so that we may preserve offspring through our father. So they made their father drink wine that night; and the firstborn went in, and lay with her father; he did not know when she law down or when she rose. On the next day, the firstborn said to the younger, "Look, I lay last night with me father; let us make him drink wine tonight also; then you go in and lie with him, so that we may preserve offspring through our father." So they made their father drink wine that night also; and the younger rose, and law with him; and he did not know when she law down or when she rose. Thus both the daughters of Lot became pregnant by their father. The firstborn bore a son, and named him Moab; he is the ancestor of the Moabites to this day. The younger also bore a son and named him Ben-ammi; he is the ancestor of the Ammonites to this day"<br /><br />I have never really understood the use of Sodom and Gomorrah as an argument against homosexuality, not that I truly understand using the Bible as an argument for or against much of anything. The entire story is pretty crazy... the town is full of rapists who want to fuck anything that moves, yet I'm supposed to believe that the problem God has with the place is homosexuality? I'm not arguing that the passage <span style="font-style: italic;">supports </span>homosexuality, but it's clearly not the focus of the story. But, what I find really interesting are the other aspects of the story, because... well, things get pretty weird.<br /><br />First, the supposedly righteous Lot is pretty quick (in a scene very reminiscent of Abraham's willingness to sacrifice Isaac) to offer up his daughters to the crazed mob as a substitute for the angels, yet is rewarded by being saved, while his wife is turned into a pillar of salt because she decides to look back at the destruction. Furthermore, and correct me if I'm wrong, Lot's daughter's don't seem to incur any divine retribution for raping their father. The usual argument I get when I bring this up to people is that they believed they were the only people left on earth and were trying to repopulate it. But, that doesn't make much sense. First, it is clear that God's wrath is against Sodom and Gomorrah (for, I would argue, being horrible, violent wretches, and having nothing to do with their sexuality) and he doesn't have plans to wipe out all of humanity. Secondly, God sends Lot's family to Zoar, which seems to be another city, and thus should be populated to some extent. This is a bit more tenuous, but only reinforces my point that the whole story is pretty nonsensical. I imagine the entire point was to poke fun at the Moabites and Ammonites rather than be some sort of moral story, but who knows. It seems to me like they both just had some serious Electra complexes. They couldn't even wait a day to get the guy drunk and have their way with him? That's pretty desperate, especially if you think you're the last people on earth.<br /><br />So, the next time anyone tries to use Genesis as an argument against homosexuality, I'm just going to quote Genesis 19:30-38. You know what... forget that... It's a good passage to bring up in pretty much any old situation. Oh, and... someone get to writing a book from the perspectives of Lot's daughters. That'd be an interesting read.Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13525367892735017144noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2332887129478888851.post-90190324949984445112010-05-05T00:00:00.000-04:002010-05-05T00:00:03.274-04:00Happy Cinco de Mayo<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7lsYfN-bS-uCZWQntXXXg4_nyja-JjIw5FUXe4VaYa9BQuf-ShCPxzTnrSv0NbdUNuKmU0gq7RkPUS1VI4bcZDO96bM8i2aBCWX57GXFfrGLOA4GLvNvLIC7C40MiV-vHo5-kWYRldP8/s1600/HellboyInMexicoAlt.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 264px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7lsYfN-bS-uCZWQntXXXg4_nyja-JjIw5FUXe4VaYa9BQuf-ShCPxzTnrSv0NbdUNuKmU0gq7RkPUS1VI4bcZDO96bM8i2aBCWX57GXFfrGLOA4GLvNvLIC7C40MiV-vHo5-kWYRldP8/s400/HellboyInMexicoAlt.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5467625286058155362" /></a>Calebhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03791855070147228790noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2332887129478888851.post-67579427306375112142010-05-03T12:02:00.003-04:002010-05-03T15:38:47.700-04:00A Green LanternEarlier I saw some concept images for the upcoming (2011) Green Lantern movie and it got me thinking...<br /><br />"Wouldn't this make a better science fiction movie than it would a super-hero movie?"<br /><br />I know that people will argue that super-hero movies are science fiction movies. But that isn't true. Just the same way that there are horror movies that aren't science fiction. It can take place in space, it can defy physics, it can raise the dead or build a laser- but none of these things make it science fiction.<br /><br />The problem is of course that Sci-Fi is both a genre and a topic. Because of this the distinction between what <span style="font-style:italic;">is</span> science fiction and what <span style="font-style:italic;">is about</span> an aspect of science fiction is sometimes difficult to tell. Stephen King has a book (<span style="font-style:italic;">Danse Macabre</span>) all about how some movies, like Alien, might take place in space and have astro-miners and aliens but are inherently horror films. The astro-miners are the protagonists but the antagonist, the alien, is a monster. This is much the same way that Frankenstein (1931) is a horror or monster movie and not science fiction, even though it is full of text tubes and has a mad scientist. James Bond movies are full of lasers and space technology but it is pretty clear that these things are plot devices, MacGussins, furthering the plot but adding very little in terms of theme. <br /><br />But that's what makes a movie science fiction. Theme rather than content is what makes it a genre. However, its common for the dichotomy in science fiction to be taken advantage of. Not jut works borrowing the look or style of science fiction but by the direct degeneration of genre based on its successes. As a prominent literary genre science fiction shares some themes with other genres, as they all do. But too often is a successful piece in this genre re-categorized as Literature, implying something about the nature of science fiction as a genre and the other books under that distinction. (But this, in itself, raises the issue of genres. There is a very strong argument against organizing art by genre. Non-stronger perhaps than walking through a book store and recognizing the complete incompetence of the aisles. Nevermind high and low art. Because <span style="font-style:italic;">Brave New World </span>can be removed from 'Science Fiction' and put in it 'Literature' it should not be a surprise that Ralph Ellison's <span style="font-style:italic;">Invisible Man</span> can be taken out of 'Literature' and put amongst the growing number of black romance novels that are beginning to define the 'African American Lit.' section. But it is a surprise.)<br /><br />Science fiction is a very difficult to interpret type of story telling because it is a topic and a genre. But it shouldn't be this hard. the themes in science fiction, the true tropes of the genre, are abundant, giving, and clear. The morality, implications, intentions, behind these ideas and how they are used is what breathes life into true science fiction. Traveling through time or flying through space can mean more than just point A to point B. But often it doesn't, and that is why so much posing as science fiction sucks. And it really sucks. <br /><br />If we are going to hold on to antiquated organizational means such as we have now than new distinctions need to be made. Maybe there is a difference between science fiction and sci-fi and maybe it is high and low. But even if there isn't, is it so much to ask that people at least start to think about it and make some better decisions. <br /><br />There is a line in the sand. It the past few years I have only seen a handful of truly great and truly science fiction movies made. Moon, Sunshine, District 9. If movies like these want to compete than they need to avoid the Superhero Summers. I have pretty low hope for science fiction at the movies this year. I'd really hoped that the superhero trend would end and that movies like Avatar would start a new trend and like the 80s we could finally get some good science fiction back. But maybe next year or the year after that.<br /><br />I don't really care about Green Lantern, at all. But, here is an opportunity, a real chance, to do something with the superhero movie as a type. Of all the comic book characters that have been offered the chance at film none of the big names has the clear option to be a science fiction movie more than Green Lantern. As far as a superhero story goes Green Lantern is soft science fiction bordering at times on fantasy. What more could they ask for? How much easier could it be to make this mainstream film science fiction and do it right- making it enjoyable but also provocative. Make a superhero movie sure, if you must, but make it explorative.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8nf1asr0Y9kMM4InkvCp03UdjT3hNYrfXHg-aAxuJ8LuO9tfH335yPuY9SAYtXIG4HbIs4tdhePMueoeWNftn5m2EKa_3gcGuVhtxdamgya62hxB2GxEc9HlQcdpPTLbLd3Iagf_zRCk/s1600/500x_15138.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 229px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8nf1asr0Y9kMM4InkvCp03UdjT3hNYrfXHg-aAxuJ8LuO9tfH335yPuY9SAYtXIG4HbIs4tdhePMueoeWNftn5m2EKa_3gcGuVhtxdamgya62hxB2GxEc9HlQcdpPTLbLd3Iagf_zRCk/s400/500x_15138.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5467089509163165266" /></a><br /> photo credit: <a href="http://io9.com/">io9</a>Calebhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03791855070147228790noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2332887129478888851.post-42802816076020980982010-04-26T15:12:00.001-04:002010-04-26T15:12:00.212-04:00Mega Man Soccer<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgINhF3UVKTp4FxjwqAFOFwSP8METcJVigHKDtz54D_KJiDba1vXSBzx4E_EVzls4QS4itCCNQdJ8gWwOZy8506lBRnzSUzZNeasY72wE962hjxfhHPieRhuVdl14M96iMcEVThwuoswGQ/s1600/megaman+advancing.bmp"><img style="float: right; margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; cursor: pointer; width: 200px; height: 107px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgINhF3UVKTp4FxjwqAFOFwSP8METcJVigHKDtz54D_KJiDba1vXSBzx4E_EVzls4QS4itCCNQdJ8gWwOZy8506lBRnzSUzZNeasY72wE962hjxfhHPieRhuVdl14M96iMcEVThwuoswGQ/s200/megaman+advancing.bmp" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5459319636533700418" border="0" /></a>Name: Mega Man’s Soccer<br />System: SNES<br />Developer: Capcom<br />Publisher: Capcom<br />Release Date: 1994<br />Genre: Sports<br /><br />Whether this game is actually any good or not, I can’t really say for sure. I am not too familiar with soccer games as a whole, especially not those on the SNES, but I can tell you that, at the very least, the game is damn interesting.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgdg-DvA-_u0uWpT6P-Bl4XvL7z-sZhcoTDV5J25OCOL8jSByTp2SZ0gvo69Au-72hyphenhyphenFinqaf15JjCvBf30qi0WouWDtRNbjFSMuOugnXfbm1vNejtXHoRKgWK6O_cfO3bIN2WrKEdtW5E/s1600/megaman+pharoah.bmp"><img style="float: left; margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 171px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgdg-DvA-_u0uWpT6P-Bl4XvL7z-sZhcoTDV5J25OCOL8jSByTp2SZ0gvo69Au-72hyphenhyphenFinqaf15JjCvBf30qi0WouWDtRNbjFSMuOugnXfbm1vNejtXHoRKgWK6O_cfO3bIN2WrKEdtW5E/s320/megaman+pharoah.bmp" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5459319831026417554" border="0" /></a>The biggest problem is that it’s a pretty boring game. Yet, there are a whole host of other issues that I should probably enumerate before I go any further. It is far too easy to slide tackle the ball away from the opponent, passing is difficult, the game switches the player you are controlling automatically so often you end up running away from the ball at times, and your view of the field is so small that it is almost impossible to actually get anything resembling an offense going without looking at the map at the top of the screen, which causes you to take your eyes off the play for a precious second. Yeah… there are a lot of issues, yet for some reason I still really enjoy playing the game. Not for long periods of time, but picking it up every once in a while is a blast, especially if you have an opponent to play.<br /><br /><br />Sco<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjp5fHnr7mt5mk9-UUDe9l2QJ2vlOHy65Nfn0h8TTx_Uc73ghfMZ816CranqV3-E-NKoJeHZ02ZRxCKM1bjWkzFREfkWhGpdqZSu28lYMnPWL7Z-rU8Or8Ns2a08RG3X5R2SRxwurILOWE/s1600/megaman+team+select.bmp"><img style="float: right; margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjp5fHnr7mt5mk9-UUDe9l2QJ2vlOHy65Nfn0h8TTx_Uc73ghfMZ816CranqV3-E-NKoJeHZ02ZRxCKM1bjWkzFREfkWhGpdqZSu28lYMnPWL7Z-rU8Or8Ns2a08RG3X5R2SRxwurILOWE/s320/megaman+team+select.bmp" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5459319222229555218" border="0" /></a>ring is difficult, but it’s soccer so that’s fairly realistic. There are power shots, which make scoring much easier, but you only get two a game. Other than these you can score often enough using one-timers and less often by shooting close to the goal but at an angle. You can compose your team of a variety of different characters and align them in a wide variety of different formations. And despite all of the flaws in the gameplay, there is something undeniably cool about the game. I remember the first time I ever played it was at the house of one of my classmates. I say classmate, because I never really liked him all that much, and the dick wouldn’t even tell me the controls, so I got slaughtered, but I remember coming away from the game thinking how cool it was… It was Mega Man, and while I had never played a Mega Man game before, I of course knew who the Blue Bomber was. And that is the real charm of the game, and perhaps it’s only redeeming quality. It’s a game full of Mega Mans, Cutmans, Woodmans, Toadmans and a whole slew of others who just ooze charm and nostalgia. It is the predecessor to Mario Tennis and all those other sports titles. There is quite simply something grand about a game that pits video games characters against one another in soccer.<br /><br />The graphics are decent enough for a game of the era, but nothing special and the music is a bit repetitive and can get fairly annoying after a while. Each of the characters have different stats, affecting how well they play defense, kick the ball, and run, among other things. There are several different stadiums, all of which are built like indoor soccer arenas, with boards instead of sidelines, but none of which are any different except for their coat of paint. While a generic soccer game like this wouldn’t even be worth a look back, because it is Mega Man, I still have a special fondness for it. It’s frustrating, difficult and pretty bland, but you can’t tell me that it isn’t cool.<br /><br />Score: 5/10Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13525367892735017144noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2332887129478888851.post-82753005601015343212010-04-18T14:35:00.001-04:002010-04-18T14:35:00.240-04:00Common Sense"Perhaps the sentiments contained in the following pages, are not <span style="font-style: italic;">yet </span>sufficiently fashionable to procure them general favor; a long habit of not thinking a thing <span style="font-style: italic;">wrong</span>, gives it a superficial appearance of being <span style="font-style: italic;">right</span>, and raises at first a formidable outcry in defence of custom. But the tumult soon subsides. Time makes more converts than reason."<br /><br />Thomas Paine began his pamphlet <span style="font-style: italic;">Common Sense</span> with the paragraph above. The essay was incredibly influential in Colonial America and helped to stir up revolutionary fervor against Britain that would be instrumental to starting the American Revolution. In it, Paine rails against monarchy in general and the British monarchy specifically, while espousing the virtues of the colonies and urging them to fight against the motherland.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh_nm_lSqXTLYs7sKrHmU4JSWg5ZmD3mKLmuUzBiOv_EL2JnYheYsHHugOvIw2jOE2ZEQbAkI0CrdNmrgmOYbmBmIQbbOFWjihf5ergT0kewfY5aO6CFMmE4UkNNw_0gP2DDfXrj4foLW8/s1600/Paine.jpg"><img style="display: block; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 246px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh_nm_lSqXTLYs7sKrHmU4JSWg5ZmD3mKLmuUzBiOv_EL2JnYheYsHHugOvIw2jOE2ZEQbAkI0CrdNmrgmOYbmBmIQbbOFWjihf5ergT0kewfY5aO6CFMmE4UkNNw_0gP2DDfXrj4foLW8/s320/Paine.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5459312127554731138" border="0" /></a>Oddly enough, Paine was born in England and only arrived in the colonies in 1774, before promptly beginning to raise hell. He was a revolutionary through and through, and in the 1790s he found himself in France, you guessed it, to take part in yet another Revolution. He was elected to the National Convention, but managed to get on Robespierre's bad side and was arrested. This was no unusual event at the time (see: The Reign of Terror) and Paine only barely avoided painting, with the help of a little contraption called the guillotine, the Paris streets with his blood.<br /><br />I was unaware of Paine's involvement in the French Revolution and it only increases my already high opinion of him. The man was an idealist and a rabble-rouser, pure and simple. You don't go around sticking your nose in other people's Revolutions unless you believe in them or are suicidal.<br /><br />But, perhaps the most interesting nugget of information I discovered about his life, was that while in France, Paine developed a menage a trois with Nicholas Bonnevile and his wife. They slept together for several years and when Paine returned to America, Bonnevile sent his wife and children (who were Paine's godchildren) along with him. From what I was able to gather, this had something to do with Bonneville having been arrested by Napoleon, and though now free, he was still under heavy surveillance.<br /><br />Throughout his life, Paine always followed his convictions, even if they were unpopular. He was a deist who opposed organized religion, a revolutionary who opposed monarchy and a great firebrand. I think it is overlooked just how radical these movements were in a European age of absolute monarchs. Men like Paine were anathema to the social and political order, because they were against everything that it stood for. Life, liberty and pursuit of happiness... liberty, equality, fraternity... sovereignty deriving from the people... these concepts were so fundamentally opposed to the established order that Revolutionary France was at war with every major power in Europe. To put it simply, Paine was a hero, who fought not for himself, but for the ideals that he so strongly believed in.<br /><br /><span style="font-size:85%;">Note: Most of the information here is gleaned from years spent studying history as well as several classes I have taken. The information about Paine's personal life comes from a few short notes in <span style="font-style: italic;">Fire int he Minds of Men </span>by James H. Billington, a wonderful study of revolutionary movements in Europe, but probably not a book for those not already well-versed in the history of 18th and 19th century Europe.</span>Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13525367892735017144noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2332887129478888851.post-2441989968728567092010-04-14T13:23:00.000-04:002010-04-14T13:23:00.355-04:00Umlaut EducationBeing a somewhat competent German speaker, I have wondered for many years why umlauts appear over some English words in some books... coöperate, reënact, naïve, etc. In German, umlauts indicate a different pronunciation and in actuality are treated as separate letters, or at least pseudo-letters, to begin with. So, it never made much sense to my why they were in the middle of these normal English words. Maybe it was a typo, I thought, or some publisher idiosyncrasy about repeating vowels, but I never really took the time to find out. Obviously, I was always in the middle of reading when it happened, so I would just move on and forget about them. But more and more a pattern started to develop... it was always in older works and always on the second of two consecutive vowels.<br /><br />As it turns out, it is not an umlaut at all, but is called a <a href="http://desktoppub.about.com/cs/expertcharacters/a/diacriticals_2.htm">diaeresis</a> and is used to indicate that the vowel under it is pronounced differently or separately from the preceding one. I've always thought the words look sort of awkward with the diaeresis, but it is a nice aid for pronunciation. Of course, seeing as English words like to be as difficult as possible to pronounce, the diaeresis is hardly used today.<br /><br /><br />If you're interested, there is a bit more history of the diaeresis <a href="http://www.everything2.com/index.pl?node=diaeresis">here</a>.Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13525367892735017144noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2332887129478888851.post-27551209044167756002010-04-11T11:56:00.000-04:002010-04-11T11:56:00.417-04:00MittensOnce again, a post about my map obsession and once again a link to Strange Maps. This time we have an interesting post about BSD's <a href="http://strangemaps.wordpress.com/2010/04/06/454-michigan-the-hands-on-state/">home state</a>, complete with a little German lesson at the bottom. How could I resist? The only problem with the post, is that the handmap is so obviously wrong. The thumb is jutting way too far east, doing who knows what to Ontario.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh52WLWSD4B9goDiqhC3m2510Eazg5hztKgw3qNyhGlLps75Y13fLJBPEf7EHac5vk6a2sieLhWdaFh8PdZW3wQeeducj4FmKAUO-V1YTSz-gMd0yCg4s86apq_RMUCTYWlMpfJoXv-904/s1600/michigan+mitten.jpg"><img style="display: block; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 282px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh52WLWSD4B9goDiqhC3m2510Eazg5hztKgw3qNyhGlLps75Y13fLJBPEf7EHac5vk6a2sieLhWdaFh8PdZW3wQeeducj4FmKAUO-V1YTSz-gMd0yCg4s86apq_RMUCTYWlMpfJoXv-904/s400/michigan+mitten.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5456869210026943282" border="0" /></a><br />But, it is actually quite a good way to show Michigan geography and while I have never actually used it to point out my hometown, I have explained the locations of other places on my hand. I have a feeling I'll wind up using it more if I ever leave.<br /><br />I just hope that this post doesn't trigger a five minute ramble from Stef about the little man with the hat that I always seem to get whenever I try to bring up American geography to her.Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13525367892735017144noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2332887129478888851.post-48290119324593999872010-04-09T12:08:00.001-04:002010-04-09T12:08:00.680-04:00Colonial WinterI have always liked the term Indian Summer, which is a fairly common term in the northern U.S. I have always taken it to mean unseasonably warm weather in Fall after the first cold spell. I always wondered where the term came from, but never did much research on it. Being a historian, I should probably actually delve into some books, but I took the easy way out. According to <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Indian_Summer">Wikipedia</a>, the term has three potential origins, two of which are to the Amerindian population. Yet, if that is the case, the insult backfired, because Indian Summer may just be the most wonderful time of the year. For me the term always elicited a feeling of warmth and happiness, made me think of autumnal oranges and yellows. It is quite simply the last gasp of summer.<br /><br />However, lately I have started thinking about what the opposite of Indian Summer would be. Every year it happens... the first burst of spring occurs and everyone is jubilant, it's sixty and sunny, not a cloud in the sky and I go to the park and play baseball. Yet, it never lasts and pretty soon it's hailing, the skies are grey and the wind is howling outside my window. But, it doesn't have a name, that I know of... so I've decided to call it Colonial Winter. I think it creates a nice verbal dichotomy and reminds me of the Revolutionary War at the same time... the little Ice Age, Valley Forge, the color blue. I wonder if it'll catch on. Unfortunately for us here at BSD, yesterday was back in the forties and rainy... not quite a full blown colonial winter, but not the nice spring I'd been getting used to.Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13525367892735017144noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2332887129478888851.post-67145344041164791032010-04-07T13:00:00.000-04:002010-04-07T13:00:01.976-04:00When the Weather outside is ...A friend sent <a href="http://www.tomscott.com/weather/starwars/">this my way</a>. The designer has a delightfully fun website with a great collection of projects. <br /><br />Put in a city anywhere in the world and this site will tell you the weather conditions there with a star wars planetary analogy. My favorite part about each forecast is that there is a little warning at the bottom pertaining particularly to the planet and it's involvement in the Star Wars movies. <br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtPShE99N-y2L9H5mlclyKJk-yQOTeQU43x-bLAF-TO2it8SPqEkb6PBVt_FynJPtM7i7VtFWV8zejqHx-n5llb2t22eNtO8QG6eB44B9IYQAvNo434cAuml8SpwzSJegqfxO-RXJ3LNw/s1600/Screenshot_1.png"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 226px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtPShE99N-y2L9H5mlclyKJk-yQOTeQU43x-bLAF-TO2it8SPqEkb6PBVt_FynJPtM7i7VtFWV8zejqHx-n5llb2t22eNtO8QG6eB44B9IYQAvNo434cAuml8SpwzSJegqfxO-RXJ3LNw/s400/Screenshot_1.png" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5457213923852611410" /></a><br /><br />Whatever you do though... don't search for somewhere that does not exist unless you're prepared to be very, very, sad.Calebhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03791855070147228790noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2332887129478888851.post-56965800222641779702010-04-05T12:27:00.002-04:002010-04-06T22:15:19.288-04:00MLB SuggestionsOpening Day is almost upon us, which means my yearly opining about baseball. However, instead of rambling on nostalgically about how much I love the game, I'm going to complain about it for once. I love baseball for many reasons, but I do have several gripes with the MLB that I'd like to enumerate. I know many of these things are not going to happen anytime soon, if at all, but if I was given free reign over baseball for a year, these are the things I would see done.<br /><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Salary Cap</span><br />The biggest problem I have with the major leagues is the income disparity between the small-market clubs and the big. You can preach free-market capitalism at me all you want, but the truth is that the MLB is a monopoly, and one protected as such through congressional legislation. I don't want to change that, but I do think that it is vital to bring about a bit of equity in the system. Baseball needs a salary cap, it's as simple as that. It would level the playing field, create some parity in the league and allow teams to keep their stars instead of being forced to trade them off for prospects once they are approaching free agency. It gets tiring seeing the best young players traded off to New York, Boston, Chicago, L.A., and yes... even to a lesser extent my Tigers year after year.<br />I know this would be a hard sell for the players association and for the high payroll teams, but it is in baseball's best interest to see this happen. Just taking look at the 2009 team <a href="http://www.cbssports.com/mlb/salaries">payrolls</a>, shows a stark contrast between the teams who can spend and those who can't. First of all, the Yankees have a payroll of almost 70 million more than the next highest team (the Mets) and over five times that of the Florida Marlins. Yet, the payroll figures only give a snapshot view of the situation. Some of these clubs are keeping unsustainable payrolls in order to compete now, while others have very low ones because their teams are so young.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPUubMhlpzpY8zfP2O-0HPPK1LuHEwNfRCwvDFWxC-VTP0VOC_ODHhFoGTuRCfd70YJNjxL2e4Xb_-OB7YkditpXxQp6CEZju0wXiE9fDirPCvnaRb2GgSQOpYlBpeHb2JQbfnxP6Rr48/s1600/mlb+TV+rights.png"><img style="display: block; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 309px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPUubMhlpzpY8zfP2O-0HPPK1LuHEwNfRCwvDFWxC-VTP0VOC_ODHhFoGTuRCfd70YJNjxL2e4Xb_-OB7YkditpXxQp6CEZju0wXiE9fDirPCvnaRb2GgSQOpYlBpeHb2JQbfnxP6Rr48/s400/mlb+TV+rights.png" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5454639391724133106" border="0" /></a><span style="font-style: italic;font-size:85%;" >MLB Blackout Areas</span><br /><br /></div>What we really need to be looking at is regional populations or market sizes. <a href="http://www.baseball-almanac.com/articles/baseball_markets.shtml">Baseball Almanac</a> has a nice article that lists the market sizes. There are some caveats to the data, however. The first is that it is a bit outdated, but population figures haven't changed enough to negate it's usefulness. Additionally, a city like New York, which has nine major sports teams (not counting MLS) to divide its fans among, probably won't have as high a percentage of its market viewing as a city like New Orleans (with only two teams) would. Yet, I don't believe it is realistic to divide the market by nine, since it is not as if residents of a city watch or attend only a finite number of games, and thus, the more teams available watch, the higher the total viewership will be, in general. I don't think anyone can argue with that. Besides, the baseball season is for the most part during the summer and without a major sports rival for much of the season. However, it is vital to split the markets of those cities with two teams in half. Still, the Yankees and Mets have a market size of over 10 million compared to the 1.6 million in Milwaukee. That is a massive gap to bridge and one that I only see two solutions to. The first is a salary cap, the second... add five or six professional teams to the New York market, and a few to L.A. and Chicago, too. Hell, we might as well give Philly, Detroit and Boston another team while we're at it. Okay, so that proposal is totally unreasonable for a variety of reasons that I won't get into. So, salary cap it is.<br /><br />Furthermore, the salary cap should be coupled with some sort of revenue sharing deal (which the MLB already has) and a payroll floor, to prevent teams from just constantly tanking like the Florida Marlins have been apt to do over the years. Not only should this system allow small market teams to better compete and keep their players, it should create a more competitive league as a whole. Drafting, the farm system and roster management suddenly become a lot more important, especially for big market teams which can no longer just throw money at their problems.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Expansion</span><br />With some money freed up, baseball may even be able to expand. This desire is obviously biased, because I simply like seeing new teams spring up, but I think it would work well. While probably not realistic in the current economic climate, I think that a more fiscally responsible MLB could definitely expand to a few more cities. Going back to the list of biggest markets in the US and Canada for a moment... I think that bringing baseball back to Montreal would be a great idea. Charlotte, San Antonio or Portland might also make nice homes for new teams, or just place another team in New York. It would cut into the TV areas and the revenue of the other teams, but I think ultimately revenue would increase for the MLB as a whole. But, my primary motive is getting the leagues back to an equal number of teams. Having 14 teams in the AL and 16 in the NL always felt so unbalanced to me. Move Milwaukee back to the AL or add two AL teams, either way it would work. The divisions could be reworked into four of four teams or have two of five and one of six.<br /><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Steroids</span><br />The steroid issue may have diminished, but baseball is definitely not in the clear yet. It is painfully obvious that the MLB turned a blind eye to the use of steroids throughout the 90s. In doing so, they not only harmed the integrity of the game, but allowed the specter of the Faustian bargain of steroids to descend upon countless young baseball players. Even with the knowledge of the harm they can cause, steroids are a huge lure to players who dream of making the big leagues. While I like to think I would not give in if I were in that position, I cannot blame those who have. The MLB needs to simply come out and admit their mistake, acknowledge that the game was compromised and that there are fraudulent records on the books. While, I don't believe that the records achieved during the era should be erased, simply because it gives players an incentive not to come clean, the major leagues need to admit to their mistake. It was the Steroids Era, the stats are out of whack, they cannot be fixed now. We will never know who used steroids or who didn't, because there is no way that everyone will com clean, but there will always be a cloud hanging over the period. All that baseball can do now is admit their mistake, implement as stringent as steroid policy as possible and move on.<br /><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Hall of Fame</span><br />On a related note, I don't believe that known or suspected steroid users should be banned from the Hall of Fame. Again, I think this policy only serves as an incentive not to admit to using steroids. Bonds, McGwire, Sosa... put them all in the Hall. Put it on the plaque that they cheated, or that they achieved fame under suspicious circumstances, I don't care, and I don't like any of them, but they deserve to be there. Just like Joe Jackson and Pete Rose do. Especially in the case of Jackson, who was given a lifetime ban, and is now dead. Shouldn't the ban be over? And keep Rose away from baseball, that's fine, but both of them deserve to be there for being some of the greatest baseball players ever. You don't have to lie or exalt any of these guys, hell... put up an exhibit about cheating and gambling on baseball if you want, just let them in. If a horrible person like Ty Cobb gets to be there, anyone who was good enough at playing should be, too.<br /><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">All-Star Game</span><br />I have several problems with the All-Star Game in its current format. The first and more egregious is that the winning league gets home field advantage in the World Series. It is beyond dumb that what amounts to an exhibition game has any effect upon the MLB championship and this has to be changed. Secondly, fan voting needs to be done away with. The average fan doesn't know enough about baseball to know who actually deserves to be in the game and most fans are too partisan to vote for anyone but their own team's players. The rosters should be decided upon by the players or managers. It is unfair to use all-star game appearance as a criteria to argue a player's merit if it is simply a popularity contest. Lastly, the rule that each team must have a representative in the game should be abolished. Once again, the only criteria that should decide who is on the all-star team is how well their season has been thus far.<br /><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Designated Hitter<br /></span>Finally, I would at the very least consider implementing a DH in the National League. My only reluctance in doing so is historical and because I think it is rather quaint to have such a huge rule difference between the two leagues. Also, I know how biased I am about this rule having grown up a fan of an American League team. Nonetheless, I don't buy into any of the arguments in opposition to the DH other than those I have already listed. The additional strategy that it provides is negligible and the necessity of pinch hitting for a pitcher at the end of the game, in my mind, is an argument in favor of the DH and not against it. Furthermore, pitcher is an extremely specialized position and the most grueling in the sport, why force them to do something that they are almost universally poor at? Kickers don't catch passes, goalies rarely shoot on net, pitchers don't need to hit. In the end, what does inserting an extremely weak batter at the bottom of every lineup do to make the game better? Nothing, that I can see.<br /><br /><br />I have little hope of most of these things coming to pass anytime soon, but that's alright. For the most part I have just been musing and the lack of reform, while frustrating at times, pales in comparison to the joy I get from watching the game. Baseball has never been my favorite sport, but it is the one that I have always felt my identity as a Detroiter has been most tied to. Perhaps it is its position as the national pastime, perhaps the fact that it is so old, or maybe its the fact that I equate it with summer and freedom and joy, but being a Tigers fan was always about more than just the game. I always felt that you were born with a team and you would die with that team. Winning or losing, I was content with the sport, because it was my heritage as a Michigander. I may enjoy watching other teams, may even someday adopt another team as a secondary rooting interesting, but the Old English D will forever be baseball to me.Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13525367892735017144noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2332887129478888851.post-26825162110722911472010-04-04T17:48:00.001-04:002010-04-04T17:52:10.466-04:00Cathulol<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmzuZ8BGSQY07MFBYxaI1OaPAjXd0Wlk61Zgvys-2l3lB8oHoiWNnaFKGS5lLzVvWrJjeAWiqPzXt33ryQJv5nV0RACd0E4ibKvWjwjtl6lbntw032Xu0foLeVySlNyzxBS8muMJmEm20/s1600/malkin-hp_lolcraft.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 250px; height: 329px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmzuZ8BGSQY07MFBYxaI1OaPAjXd0Wlk61Zgvys-2l3lB8oHoiWNnaFKGS5lLzVvWrJjeAWiqPzXt33ryQJv5nV0RACd0E4ibKvWjwjtl6lbntw032Xu0foLeVySlNyzxBS8muMJmEm20/s400/malkin-hp_lolcraft.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5456403140805264978" /></a><br /><br />via <a href="http://lolthulhu.com/">lolthulhu.com</a>Calebhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03791855070147228790noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2332887129478888851.post-54199337213091084402010-03-31T13:49:00.003-04:002010-03-31T13:54:54.529-04:00Fantasy Movie StudiosWe've decided to start a friendly game for BSD readers and other bloggers we know. It will be a fantasy movie studio game, where you start with a budge of 100 Euros and purchase movies with it. The studios are ranked by the most total box office gross at the end of three months, the studio with the highest being the winner.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxxiPd3NTtSiE9TR1ni4dsZu_D8q_c8esbLdF3Au0OTYWzsZI8RmyL9dKD3d-L8sHlNmDSUl_8x63tVBgIiuyaORwSKLnyS1Mwk1fTiBCm0a7sgTZub_y1A1A-cchzmp9yxVV45YW7ly4/s1600/film-reel.jpg"><img style="display: block; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxxiPd3NTtSiE9TR1ni4dsZu_D8q_c8esbLdF3Au0OTYWzsZI8RmyL9dKD3d-L8sHlNmDSUl_8x63tVBgIiuyaORwSKLnyS1Mwk1fTiBCm0a7sgTZub_y1A1A-cchzmp9yxVV45YW7ly4/s400/film-reel.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5454857909830266738" border="0" /></a>If you would like to play, just comment or send us an e-mail and I'll get you the sign-up information.<br /><br />The site is <a href="http://www.provolona.com/mmgmogul/indexe.php">here</a>, if you'd like to check it out.Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13525367892735017144noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2332887129478888851.post-13717530988318438852010-03-29T13:33:00.002-04:002010-03-29T13:33:00.817-04:00Here Be Dragons<span style="text-decoration: underline;"><br /></span>Another day another victory for Strange Maps. This time they bring us <a style="" href="http://http//home.netcom.com/%7Erogermw2/square_earth.html">The International Square Earth Society</a>, which I can only assume (and hope) is a spoof on the flat earth crazies.<br /><br />It's quite an authoritative and well-argued (if not well-reasoned) construction of a square earth based on biblical evidence and a good dose of insanity. My favorite section is the FAQ, where Mr. Wilcox argues that airline pilots and Hollywood (obviously) are in league with the devil.<br /><br />I suppose it is a bit confusing to distinguish between what is metaphorical or not, given all the insanity in the Bible. I'm still on Genesis, but so far it's been quite an interesting read.<br /><a style="" href="http://http//home.netcom.com/%7Erogermw2/square_earth.html"> </a>Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13525367892735017144noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2332887129478888851.post-28570146371464055112010-03-27T13:48:00.002-04:002010-03-27T13:48:00.390-04:00ThundercatsToday I have two odd and unrelated Thundercats topics to bring up. The first, and possibly the most awesome discovery in the history of the universe, is that James Lipton, host of BSD favorite Inside the Actor's Studio, wrote the theme song for <a href="http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0513851/#musicX20department">Thundercats</a>. Credit goes to Stef, and I believe <a href="http://www.cracked.com/article_18441_7-celebrities-who-had-badass-careers-you-didnt-know-about_p2.html">Cracked</a>, for discovering this. I had no idea that the Detroit native could get any cooler, but he just did.<br /><br /><object height="385" width="480"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/IVLaF3H-NEc&hl=en_US&fs=1&"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/IVLaF3H-NEc&hl=en_US&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" height="385" width="480"></embed></object><br /><br />Secondly, a while back we were watching the first episode of the series, which had some horrible inconsistencies (like why Lion-O aged so much more than WilyKit or WilyKat after they go into stasis), but the thing that bugged me most was why they are all naked (except for belts) at the beginning of the episode, but after they come out of the cold freeze they decide to put clothing on. Is it supposed to be some type of armor?<br /><br />While the skin-tight jumpsuit isn't bad at all, I'd prefer seeing Cheetara slink around in the nude for 130 episodes*.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikPm44zxhRJwfUFkRiH77G9Ji2o6Nj03LZM86MtMjM8HJkTmMKt0JuGn-vgRLAhr-OaIDy3p2wFOY_TQin0_a912OCA22sg9RuzVGdfH_HYSKYEcI8pTc9K-IboD5hsO6h2NDy1aW6nwY/s1600/thundercats-naked.jpg"><img style="display: block; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 252px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikPm44zxhRJwfUFkRiH77G9Ji2o6Nj03LZM86MtMjM8HJkTmMKt0JuGn-vgRLAhr-OaIDy3p2wFOY_TQin0_a912OCA22sg9RuzVGdfH_HYSKYEcI8pTc9K-IboD5hsO6h2NDy1aW6nwY/s400/thundercats-naked.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5452632367183810754" border="0" /></a><br />*I've only seen one episode of the show in the past fifteen years and don't plan on making it two anytime soon.Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13525367892735017144noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2332887129478888851.post-77256229993266849142010-03-25T13:15:00.005-04:002010-03-25T14:16:37.738-04:00AsbestosI buy most of my textbooks online, not only because it's cheaper, but to stick it to the monopoly that is the university book store, so I get an email every once in a while from AbeBooks. They're really more newsletters than advertisements, and often have some interesting stuff. The other day, they had an article about one of our favorite authors: <a href="http://www.abebooks.com/books/Fahrenheit-451-science-fiction-fantasy/collectible-ray-bradbury.shtml?cm_mmc=nl-_-nl-_-h00-bradbyA-_-01cta">Ray Bradbury</a>.<br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEio1pRA6Sg3fQh82gHBsEBuxDVTguFwt-ztbSPt2AyIAUvyGzfX32lGqd3lNxl1nvVZrbFLx6iF1BD8phTIrg3Ukics8Tuprj-UZvv9D0Z4USzm3bR4DOxEGmY7oQ8bpmjilqK0k4MUEsg/s1600/Fahrenheit-451+asbestos.jpg"><img style="display: block; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 180px; height: 311px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEio1pRA6Sg3fQh82gHBsEBuxDVTguFwt-ztbSPt2AyIAUvyGzfX32lGqd3lNxl1nvVZrbFLx6iF1BD8phTIrg3Ukics8Tuprj-UZvv9D0Z4USzm3bR4DOxEGmY7oQ8bpmjilqK0k4MUEsg/s400/Fahrenheit-451+asbestos.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5452623962368924802" border="0" /></a><br />I'd love to get my hands on one of the fire-proof, asbestos-covered copies of Fahrenheit 451. I've never been one to seek out first editions, and while I do collect books, I usually like to try to find the cheapest used copy I can. But this.... this is just awesome. I wonder if anyone has ever tried to light a copy on fire?<br /><br />I did a little bit of poking around and found a bit more information <a href="http://historical.ha.com/common/view_item.php?Sale_No=658&Lot_No=26116">here</a>. Apparently they only other book to have an asbestos cover was an edition of Stephen King's Firestarter.Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13525367892735017144noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2332887129478888851.post-668847183957164282010-03-20T00:18:00.001-04:002010-03-20T00:20:45.540-04:00I Want to Font<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLAE1fIr_59V15GHcagG44YENG-siQSNMSw2bfYAU4Zfy0Hj-0E3dPwahVArctETy_Morhp4FIgP4dt03eYQJzfszcuHhwitWqQyIN9qk6JgFCbLqMpg3PMk3r6jqX4jKM-kEKV-uBrU8/s1600-h/Picture+1.png"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 280px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLAE1fIr_59V15GHcagG44YENG-siQSNMSw2bfYAU4Zfy0Hj-0E3dPwahVArctETy_Morhp4FIgP4dt03eYQJzfszcuHhwitWqQyIN9qk6JgFCbLqMpg3PMk3r6jqX4jKM-kEKV-uBrU8/s400/Picture+1.png" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5450565972630381410" /></a>Calebhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03791855070147228790noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2332887129478888851.post-54190841046471936852010-03-13T17:29:00.000-05:002010-03-13T17:29:30.585-05:00Redrawing the US: 38 StatesI found the following map on one of my favorite blogs; <a href="http://strangemaps.wordpress.com/2006/09/10/5-the-38-state-union/">Strange Maps</a>, and did a bit of tweaking so that it no longer shows the current state borders. There is also some information about it <a href="http://www.tjc.com/38states/">here</a>. It's cool to view the nation in a completely new way. Apparently this redrawing of the map is an attempt to center states around major population centers and thus coordinate state services better. Obviously a proposal like this has no chance to happen without some seismic movements in the governmental structure of the U.S., but it's an interesting exercise and a cool result. However, my main problem with the map is not it's impracticality (because I love that part), but the names of the new states.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPqauJEaap6QUWVv6CXe2RuQrVIES9eC7rMZUFq-qKxSAoNNEUyGqWASJLItfZ9x6KQQrz-YSL0tul11ilNeE6k_v08UmGOVxU_yyebaUm5jg-q5XI_-8YaH0FYO5iCKtkg2g2h0lpKbc/s1600-h/38+United+States+of+America.jpg"><img style="display: block; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 244px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPqauJEaap6QUWVv6CXe2RuQrVIES9eC7rMZUFq-qKxSAoNNEUyGqWASJLItfZ9x6KQQrz-YSL0tul11ilNeE6k_v08UmGOVxU_yyebaUm5jg-q5XI_-8YaH0FYO5iCKtkg2g2h0lpKbc/s400/38+United+States+of+America.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5448248792931700466" border="0" /></a>While I do like some of the state names, most of them are just awful. Dakota and Carolina are nice because they hearken back to former states. Cumberland, Hudson and Appalachia have a nice ring to them and also. Piedmont reminds me of the old Italian kingdom, which seems a bit of an odd image to connect to the Deep South, but it was named for a present day region, so isn't too bad. But, by and large the names just seem far too random and I would I have guessed that Pearcy's only criteria was that they have some relation to the area, but had to be different from a current state. This leaves a lot to be desired. Apparently the names were actually chosen during some sort of survey in each state. This also creates problems. Things as important as naming fictional places on maps cannot be left up to the tyranny of the majority. While I do like some of these names, I think a lot of them could simply have old state names and the rest should be improved upon.<br /><br />Alamo: If you're going to name it after a battle in the Texas Revolution, why not just call it Texas?<br />Bighorn: Naming a state after a sheep, no matter how big their horns are, is a mistake.<br />Bitterroot: Is this named after the flower, the river or the mountain range? I don't know, probably all three, but it sounds awful. Bitteroot would be a fine name for some be some backwater town, but not a whole state.<br />Bonneville: This may be ex post facto, but no states should be named after cars.<br />Dearborn: While I appreciate that Chicago was once called Fort Dearborn and I appreciate a state with the same name as BSD's hometown, this is just nonsensical. No states named after the founding fathers, but you give one to Henry Dearborn?<br />Kilauea: Cool name, but why can't this just be Hawaii? The borders are exactly the same!<br />Plymouth: This is just lazy... name the place after an American Indian tribe or something, but don't revert back to Plymouth. Plymouth Colony was absorbed by the Massachusetts Bay Colony, hence the name of the modern state.<br />Prairie: A tad bit generic.Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13525367892735017144noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2332887129478888851.post-8573384460061068682010-02-24T15:36:00.000-05:002010-02-24T15:36:59.564-05:00Sonic the Hedgehog 3Name: Sonic the Hedgehog 3<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2RqIfg-g0FIt32YD2Af_ZceFRoxR-aGfQMSYuiFRIlDL5PV_x3YCevLIQfvnMXEAKghp8Q6Rt98RUMTajWKguNPu1avbkRVtpAEERnx1CfELCmlnMxaMQzC67ENOb2Rdbt9K-uNtlct8/s1600-h/sonic+3+knuckle+punch.bmp"><img style="margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; float: right; cursor: pointer; width: 200px; height: 137px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2RqIfg-g0FIt32YD2Af_ZceFRoxR-aGfQMSYuiFRIlDL5PV_x3YCevLIQfvnMXEAKghp8Q6Rt98RUMTajWKguNPu1avbkRVtpAEERnx1CfELCmlnMxaMQzC67ENOb2Rdbt9K-uNtlct8/s200/sonic+3+knuckle+punch.bmp" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5441150460464229922" border="0" /></a><br />System: Sega Genesis<br />Developer: Sonic Team<br />Publisher: Sega<br />Release Date: 1994<br />Genre: Platformer<br /><br />While I think I have to give the crown of best Sonic title to Sonic 2, Sonic 3 is a spectacular game that outdoes the second game in several ways. Better graphics, more complex levels and the diversity of gameplay introduced by the ability to play as a flying Tails all help to make it a very refreshing take on the Sonic formula.<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPFAXmyvYbf9lGeJhvrPtGKawlrTVTLzDHSrbdQEVcdlG6oJnTmr9wAaGUjy8z256wNqobHf07Qh4Bx5r14IrImWbiiRpIV-GnJd2t0TKBkipa3M6c27XOPXASkyi-NNNau0yhTnBBeKs/s1600-h/sonic+3+grasshopper.bmp"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 218px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPFAXmyvYbf9lGeJhvrPtGKawlrTVTLzDHSrbdQEVcdlG6oJnTmr9wAaGUjy8z256wNqobHf07Qh4Bx5r14IrImWbiiRpIV-GnJd2t0TKBkipa3M6c27XOPXASkyi-NNNau0yhTnBBeKs/s320/sonic+3+grasshopper.bmp" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5441150732602835394" border="0" /></a><br />Sonic 3 was an anomaly for me as a kid, but I'm not exactly sure why. Perhaps it was the more complex level designs with diverging paths or the longer stages or even just the visual style, but I never felt as comfortable with its worlds. That not to say I didn't enjoy the game, but I never got very far into it. I don't recall ever beating Hydrocity Zone as a kid, and if I did it was only a few times and I never got much further. The Zone really is not that hard if you stay on the upper portion sans water, which I never managed to do. Those second zones (Marble, Chemical Plant, Hydrocity) always gave me fits, but Hydrocity was by far the hardest. Maybe because it was so long, but it always seemed like such an epic grind of drowning, skeletal fish and spikes. As far as Angel Island Zone goes, it was more difficult than the Green Hill Zones of the first two games, but still eased one into the game. The visual style was a nice change from the other Sonic first levels, though it stuck to the green pallete. I always enjoyed<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbJQkrSRQ0yIEorfTf7f6OIy3PTXuN7hWKZH5K-nvhs3VVX11PnXlqaUdJgX-9JaijMYKAnPO6T88z1F5jHClxCNHTQs2DL-bEtsc44qabIW9iVLWobDvCPNhv9cKEQQmg45wM2xpQodg/s1600-h/sonic+3+robotnik+egg.bmp"><img style="margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; float: right; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 221px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbJQkrSRQ0yIEorfTf7f6OIy3PTXuN7hWKZH5K-nvhs3VVX11PnXlqaUdJgX-9JaijMYKAnPO6T88z1F5jHClxCNHTQs2DL-bEtsc44qabIW9iVLWobDvCPNhv9cKEQQmg45wM2xpQodg/s320/sonic+3+robotnik+egg.bmp" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5441150934394810050" border="0" /></a> the colors and look of the stage, especially after the aerial bombing as the end of Act I. At the end, the Robotnik battle is interesting, but not real challenge compared to later bosses. All in all, I think I spent too much time exploring the levels and lallygagging about than truly trying to beat them. I guess as a kid it was not all that vital to achieve victory, not when there was sightseeing and cool new lightning and fire shields, and new bonus stages to explore.<br /><br />The thing that really hits me when replaying it now is that this game is much easier than it used to be, definitely easier than Sonic 1. Angel Island is a cinch, and Hydrocity Zone isn't very difficult as long as you stay up on land, which isn't hard to do throughout most of it.<br /><br />The graphics are just gorgeous, some of the best of any 16-bit title I have played. The levels are full of color and texture that completely blows away the first two games in the series. The music, like all the Sonic games of this era is simple and catchy.<br /><br />The most startling aspect of the game is the sheer speed. While all the Sonic games are fast, 3 takes that sense of speed to a new level. The Zones are filled with slopes and accelerators (save Angel Island) that unleash Sonic upon the hapless robots around him. While this is a blast, in retrospect it gave me the feeling that I was breezing through the game, almost as if I was looking out a car window at scenery. I don't want to overstate this point, because it is minor, but spending last night playing through most of the game left me with little impression of the individuality of the zones becaus<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLkeMoxtBsVtnGotna5yyiyk2BOdSpvTFRyn_NaoTZs_q-LSyaB7FRagKzKC4lIVBLSrtKEoNQYZbdmYozJRC708azCRtv7ObYtQFODtFeBkmHX-NVj5nKFDMkv35mQgpr0bVN8WEipfc/s1600-h/sonic+3+robotnik+last+2.bmp"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 221px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLkeMoxtBsVtnGotna5yyiyk2BOdSpvTFRyn_NaoTZs_q-LSyaB7FRagKzKC4lIVBLSrtKEoNQYZbdmYozJRC708azCRtv7ObYtQFODtFeBkmHX-NVj5nKFDMkv35mQgpr0bVN8WEipfc/s320/sonic+3+robotnik+last+2.bmp" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5441151495617393410" border="0" /></a>e they are all filled with the ramps and slopes and the same sort of routes with a different color paint slapped on. The ice level is the most egregious offender in this, and while its design is cool and there are interesting enemies (penguins!), you spend most of the level just much falling down steep slopes and get little time to truly enjoy your surroundings. Perhaps it is just because I have not played through every level countless times like I have with Sonic 1 and 2, and anyway it only detracts slightly from the game, but I cannot help shaking that impression.<br /><br />While I wouldn't rank it as good as its predecessors, this is an amazing game and one that perhaps suffers somewhat because it was split in half, with Sonic and Knuckles constituting the back 9. All in all, Sonic 3 is well worth picking back up, even now, as it is an absolute classic.<br /><br />Score: 9.5<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_1pecircO0ot7oVsnhEv2zJEnmDQlswtUpWVneV_AUJzcRS-pixQBSm-GNMQBOrp8-fhk29j78U18MowDu-clShNelBEZE3X2dxTYqfBQSTW1HHauhz8DQi7iQEs7gJj8UlYoK6kTqCc/s1600-h/sonic+3+victory+2.bmp"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 275px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_1pecircO0ot7oVsnhEv2zJEnmDQlswtUpWVneV_AUJzcRS-pixQBSm-GNMQBOrp8-fhk29j78U18MowDu-clShNelBEZE3X2dxTYqfBQSTW1HHauhz8DQi7iQEs7gJj8UlYoK6kTqCc/s400/sonic+3+victory+2.bmp" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5441151184917136642" border="0" /></a>Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13525367892735017144noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2332887129478888851.post-50754487682160288802010-02-20T00:00:00.000-05:002010-02-20T15:09:15.495-05:00ClonedIn 1996 when members of the Roslin Institute in Scotland cloned the first mammal I was in the sixth grade. The cloned animal was a sheep and her name was Dolly. I can remember hearing this story on the radio the day it happened, as my parents were getting ready for work. Later that day at school, on the playground during recess myself and others who had heard about Dolly that day couldn’t help but to talk about it. <br /><br />At the time what was interesting about Dolly wasn’t that she was the first cloned mammal; we kids had been talking about clones and cloning ourselves for years. Things like nuclear power and molecular transportation were old hat for us. Gene splicing and faster than light travel seemed tedious even. I myself had spent much of that year flying to school on the back of a resurrected pterodactyl, which wasn’t convenient but did serve as a reasonably interesting way of diluting an otherwise boring 7 a.m. car ride to school.<br /><br />The reason why Dolly held our attention that day was that this was the first time we had heard adults talk about the science with as much interest as we had been doing all along. At last it seemed like the real world was beginning to catch up with our demands and expectations. Though we still had to brush our teeth the old fashioned way, and drive in cars to get from one place to the next, and eat our meals sitting down bite by bite, now, maybe, we are finally going to start getting genuine copies of ourselves, ready to do what we said when we said it.<br /><br />“If I had a clone,” Brandon’s sister said, “I’d make it do everything for me I didn’t want to do.”<br />Brandon’s sister was older than me by a year or two, but I knew her brother and could usually count on her not sending me away or talking down to me when I stumbled into a conversation she was having. And she was always having conversations, and they were always her conversation so you had to be careful. <br /><br />“You’d treat yourself like a servant?” I asked her.<br /><br />As we had it worked out cloning was a way of duplicating another living thing. Maybe you would put the thing or person in one end of a machine and then a little while later, maybe minutes or maybe days, two of it came out the other side of the machine. We’d all been sent to the copy room before to make copies for our teachers and so we knew how a Xerox machine worked. Some of us had even made rudimentary attempts at the cloning process ourselves; pressing our hands and faces against the cold glass of the machine as the white heat of the light scanned and reflected against the contours of our aspects. We'd blindly stumble out of the copy room with the light of God the Creator still in our eyes and an elongated, gray skinned mutant of ourselves folded up and tucked away in the pocket of our corduroys. <br /> <br />“No,” she said, “I’d treat my CLONE like a servant. Or maybe a slave.”<br /> <br />I didn’t know what to say to this. For one, I was a white kid and she was black. Playground rules dictated that in the area of race relations and conversation discourse I was predetermined wrong and/or racist on any conversations concerning the names of skin colors and the usage of certain words, like ‘negro’ or ‘black.’ Also, Brandon’s sister was bigger than me, and kind of bully. I knew that if she was okay with bullying her clone than it’d mean much less to her to bully me. I had to be careful what I said to her. <br /><br />“But if you don’t want to do something, what makes you think your clone of yourself is going to be any happier doing that same thing than you would be?” I asked Brandon’s sister. <br /> <br />“Listen, she’s my clone and she’ll do what I tell her.”<br /> <br />It was clear to me that Brandon’s sister had taken an entirely adult perspective on the situation. Or rather, that she had taken an entirely parental perspective on the situation. She was prepared to treat a clone of herself as she might treat a daughter: as her own property, endowed with thought and movement only because she had so willed it to be. <br />“And then, when I was done with it, when it got home from school for me or finished cleaning my room and taking out the trash,” she said, “I’d just kill it. And make another one the next day.”<br /> <br />“That seems wasteful,” I said. I could tell I was starting to reach that point where Brandon’s sister would no longer be able to tolerate my presence in her conversation, but I didn’t really mind, I was far more concerned with the fact that she was beginning to advocate not only the wasteful and lazy use and disposal of genetic materials (something I myself would not become comfortable with until much later in puberty) but that she was also beginning to fantasize about third-person, singularly neutral homicide. “What would you do with the bodies?”<br /><br />“I’d dig a hole.” Brandon’s sister said. “Wait, no, I’d make it dig the hole and then I’d kill it.”<br />Years later I would remember Brandon’s sister saying that when I read Elie Wiesel. I have to consider myself lucky that what Brandon’s sister said resounded with me as an empty and hypothetical threat, entirely unlike Wiesel's own experience. <br />Our conversation was degrading from innocent daydreaming. As Brandon’s sister continued she stopped using the pronouns "she" and "her" to refer to her imagined clone and instead relied completely on the title “It,” which she had given her clone, her slave and her victim.<br /><br />By this time other people had begun to interject there own ideas into our conversation. Max, who was a beast of a child and who's own clone I was positive would resemble a homunculus even more than he did, had his own ideas on the matter which rivaled Brandon’s sister’s in insensitivity if not entirely in cruelty.<br /> <br />"It would be wasteful to kill them everyday," Max said. "It would be a lot easier to just train one and pay very close attention to it. That way you could keep it for a long time and only have to kill it if you caught it stealing stuff, or touching your things or getting too smart."<br /> <br />"Or you could beat it like a dog," someone else suggested. "That's what we had to do with our dog. It kept yelping at my little brother so my dad threw his shoe at it. He told us if it ever did that to do the same thing." <br /><br />A few older kids had more debauched notions of their clones. A boy from one of the advanced biology classes, I think his name was Eddie, suggested changing one of his clone's Y-chromosomes to an X in order to make it a girl. This had to be explained to the group. Smirks grimaces passed over everyone’s faces to think of Eddie like this. <br /><br />I didn't understand it; some of the kids were okay with the idea of beating and killing clones but were repulsed by the insinuation of developing incestuous relationships with them. Eddie had only one eye; the other had been removed when he was just a baby. It seemed to me that a better use of an Eddie clone would be to supply a replacement eye for Eddie. I considered that even that type of harvesting and transplantation of a clone’s body was self-aggrandizing. This, coupled with the fact that I had already embarrassed myself and Eddie earlier that year when I’d asked him to take out his glass eye and show me the inside of his head was enough to make me keep my mouth shut.<br /><br />Anyways, Eddie didn’t want a new eye. What he wanted was a girlfriend, or at least something like one. Too bad it would also be something like him. I tried not to think of Eddie in this way but I could not help to. I could not help but envision Eddie as I am sure everyone had. But, unlike everyone else, when I imagined Eddie copulating with his female self the two Eddie’s passed back and forth a pink and squishy eye while they humped themselves. <br /><br />The conversation we were having was at its base a conversation of ethics. Or, and maybe more correctly, it was a conversation about a lack of ethics. Though the language we used concerned the bioethics of cloning we were each of us talking about not how we would treat our clones but how we would treat others. Many of us were so selfish and fool hearted as to misunderstand that we were talking about how we would treat ourselves. The self-destruction that our conversation extolled upon was amazing to me. Hadn’t we heard it a million times before, play nice, be kind, and treat others, as you want them to treat you? This conversation was cruel because it could be. It was unchallenged and in being so it had turned against us. This was not the curiosity of the playground that prompts you to bury trash in the sandbox and call it a time capsule or draw dirty pictures in the back of your notebooks. No, this was the idiocy that caused people to be pushed off of swing sets and left out of kickball games. This was calling each other “gay” and teasing the smelly kid. <br />"That is disgusting," Brandon’s sister said. She had a damning look on her face as she tried to reclaim the conversation. "You're all a bunch of perverts" she said. The bell rang and everyone sprinted away in different directions but ending up, eventually, in the same place. <br /><br />I began to trudge back into the school building. I was left thinking about everything that had been said by our collection of playground philosophers. It appalled me, being the moralist of the group. Never mind how we might treat our clones, if and when we ever met them. How were we going to treat our children, our parents our friends if this was the way we would treat ourselves?<br /><br />When Dolly was only six years old her body showed degenerative symptoms of aging. Her life expectancy at birth had been 12 years but gene have their own age and the mammary gland materials which were used to create Dolly were already six years old they themselves had been placed within an egg and began mitosis. Her body had some catching up to do and it did in 2003. Dolly was euthanised by the men and woman who had helped to create her. When she died she was suffering from crippling arthritis and lung disease. She was twice as old as she had lived, a concept I wish we could have known about that day on the playground. <br /><br />When Dolly died when I was in high school and I had far more important things to think about then her. New sciences interested me, like the aerodynamics of a Dodge Neon, the volume of its back seat and the long overworked hypothesis I had constructed concerning the female orgasm. This is because when Dolly did die I was also a clone and had been for many years, as are each of us of our younger selves. Although in memories I still share all of the same genetic makeup as my former self, in reality I know that I am not he.Calebhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03791855070147228790noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2332887129478888851.post-77642070510111078662010-02-14T00:15:00.000-05:002010-02-14T02:23:28.218-05:00Le Transi de René de Chalo<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2eyrMK_5LZNSuO3zVXfbcQ7wQXcZU_TApKQUYWlqGxFqAAa7gj4cXp6T75gxS2588mVvSc1smp9YJ49tfIjrCjEg639s_iOpL43PE9nvpSdcgsSfC81tqDfxrxwVjzsk0qDeMTN228Pg/s1600-h/20060812-108578280744de0c3a826c1.jpg" style="text-decoration: none;"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 268px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2eyrMK_5LZNSuO3zVXfbcQ7wQXcZU_TApKQUYWlqGxFqAAa7gj4cXp6T75gxS2588mVvSc1smp9YJ49tfIjrCjEg639s_iOpL43PE9nvpSdcgsSfC81tqDfxrxwVjzsk0qDeMTN228Pg/s400/20060812-108578280744de0c3a826c1.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5436293743315594322"></a><font class="Apple-style-span" face="sans-serif" size="13px" style=" line-height: 19px; "><div class="thumb tright" style="margin-bottom: 0.8em; border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; width: auto; clear: right; float: right; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; margin-top: 0.5em; margin-right: 0px; margin-left: 1.4em; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; background-color: white; "></div></font><br /><br />"Prince of Orange René de Chalons died in battle in 1544, at age 25. His widow commissioned the sculptor Ligier Richier to represent him offering his heart to God, set against the painted splendour of his former worldly estate. Church of Saint-Étienne,Bar-le-Duc."Calebhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03791855070147228790noreply@blogger.com2