Mittens

Once again, a post about my map obsession and once again a link to Strange Maps. This time we have an interesting post about BSD's home state, complete with a little German lesson at the bottom. How could I resist? The only problem with the post, is that the handmap is so obviously wrong. The thumb is jutting way too far east, doing who knows what to Ontario.


But, it is actually quite a good way to show Michigan geography and while I have never actually used it to point out my hometown, I have explained the locations of other places on my hand. I have a feeling I'll wind up using it more if I ever leave.

I just hope that this post doesn't trigger a five minute ramble from Stef about the little man with the hat that I always seem to get whenever I try to bring up American geography to her.

Colonial Winter

I have always liked the term Indian Summer, which is a fairly common term in the northern U.S. I have always taken it to mean unseasonably warm weather in Fall after the first cold spell. I always wondered where the term came from, but never did much research on it. Being a historian, I should probably actually delve into some books, but I took the easy way out. According to Wikipedia, the term has three potential origins, two of which are to the Amerindian population. Yet, if that is the case, the insult backfired, because Indian Summer may just be the most wonderful time of the year. For me the term always elicited a feeling of warmth and happiness, made me think of autumnal oranges and yellows. It is quite simply the last gasp of summer.

However, lately I have started thinking about what the opposite of Indian Summer would be. Every year it happens... the first burst of spring occurs and everyone is jubilant, it's sixty and sunny, not a cloud in the sky and I go to the park and play baseball. Yet, it never lasts and pretty soon it's hailing, the skies are grey and the wind is howling outside my window. But, it doesn't have a name, that I know of... so I've decided to call it Colonial Winter. I think it creates a nice verbal dichotomy and reminds me of the Revolutionary War at the same time... the little Ice Age, Valley Forge, the color blue. I wonder if it'll catch on. Unfortunately for us here at BSD, yesterday was back in the forties and rainy... not quite a full blown colonial winter, but not the nice spring I'd been getting used to.

Fantasy Movie Studios

We've decided to start a friendly game for BSD readers and other bloggers we know. It will be a fantasy movie studio game, where you start with a budge of 100 Euros and purchase movies with it. The studios are ranked by the most total box office gross at the end of three months, the studio with the highest being the winner.

If you would like to play, just comment or send us an e-mail and I'll get you the sign-up information.

The site is here, if you'd like to check it out.

Here Be Dragons

Another day another victory for Strange Maps. This time they bring us The International Square Earth Society, which I can only assume (and hope) is a spoof on the flat earth crazies.

It's quite an authoritative and well-argued (if not well-reasoned) construction of a square earth based on biblical evidence and a good dose of insanity. My favorite section is the FAQ, where Mr. Wilcox argues that airline pilots and Hollywood (obviously) are in league with the devil.

I suppose it is a bit confusing to distinguish between what is metaphorical or not, given all the insanity in the Bible. I'm still on Genesis, but so far it's been quite an interesting read.

Asbestos

I buy most of my textbooks online, not only because it's cheaper, but to stick it to the monopoly that is the university book store, so I get an email every once in a while from AbeBooks. They're really more newsletters than advertisements, and often have some interesting stuff. The other day, they had an article about one of our favorite authors: Ray Bradbury.



I'd love to get my hands on one of the fire-proof, asbestos-covered copies of Fahrenheit 451. I've never been one to seek out first editions, and while I do collect books, I usually like to try to find the cheapest used copy I can. But this.... this is just awesome. I wonder if anyone has ever tried to light a copy on fire?

I did a little bit of poking around and found a bit more information here. Apparently they only other book to have an asbestos cover was an edition of Stephen King's Firestarter.

Bananas

When I first found out about this method for banana peeling I was a bit skeptical, but after trying it a few times, it really is a far simpler and more effective method. It takes a little bit of getting used to, but once you get the hang out it, it's great. I've found that it's best to pinch the smaller ends of the little nub at the bottom of the banana rather than the wider part as it splits in half this way rather than into three peels.



It really makes me wonder whether I could be doing a lot of other things more efficiently

Changing Fashions

Well... I can't say I ever foresaw the day where I would be writing a BSD post about fashion, but here it is. The entire video is pretty cool in itself, but the real treat comes at the end. Just think of how much effort this will save strippers!




via Cracked.

Swiss Neutrality

In a referendum, Switzerland has banned the construction of minarets in the country. I am not going to delve too deep into how ridiculous of a step this is or the illogical arguments of those advocating it, but I simply do not see how an architectural form can increase Muslim extremism, like those arguing for this ban suggest. In fact, I can only see this ban increasing that extremism. Persecuting a group is not usually a good way to make them less extreme.

But, what really bothers me is that Europe seems to be moving more towards restricting freedoms. I'm no expert on Swiss government, but this seems to go against everything that Europe always spouts about being a free and open society. I don't want to imply that it is only Switzerland, because other European nations, notably France and Germany, have recently instituted similar rulings that are mindlessly oppressive to a minority.

Were here at BSD are, and always will be supporters of any freedom with does not infringe upon the rights of others.

Italian Body Parts

I'm not sure what it is about Italian and preserving the remains of historical figures, but two interesting articles about body parts showed up on BBC this week.

The first, is that Galileo's fingers and tooth have been found. That desiccated finger is without a doubt one of the most disgusting things I have ever seen in my life.

In addition to the remains of the great astronomer being found, Il Duce's brain has apparently been stolen. I think we all know where this is going: some sort of Franken-dictator is being fashioned in Switzerland. While this can't be good, I sort of have a feeling he'll just end up in a tree again.

Wet Riffs

If I'm not mistaken this is the first time we've mentioned XKCD on this blog, which is a travesty. It's an amazing webcomic, despite the fact that I don't understand math worth a lick. It's well worth at the very least a minutes of your time.

WetRiffs.com, is quite possibly the greatest site on the internet. I know our readers (especially those of the tentacle rape persuasion) will be surprised by that statement seeing as how amazing BSD is, but it's true. Water + nudity + guitars is simple too awesome for us to handle. And likely for all of you, they are still taking submissions.

Note: the other pictures on the site are much sexier than this.

Here is some bonus material for you all, which I also found through XKCD, of some hot, European chess action.

Arrested Development Movie

During the life of this blog we've seen the return of X-Files, Futurama and Star Trek. And while those returns had varying degrees of greatness, I have high hopes for our next resurrected franchise.

While this has been bounced around for a while now, I have a lot more confidence in the creation of an Arrested Development movie now that Jason Bateman confirmed it on Inside the Actor's Studio. It is also up on IMDb and looking pretty real.

Also, for bonus points, try watching the series backwards. It's really interesting to see how the plot unfolds that way.

Man's Best Friend

This is late, but I don't think that matters much. The following comes from Iowa football blog Black Heart Gold Pants:

"Senior linebacker Pat Argerer tore ligaments in his right thumb early in the Arkansas State game, but he said it won't affect his status for this week or beyond. 'You don't need thumbs,' he said. 'My best friend is my brother's dog. He doesn't have any thumbs and he's doing fine.'"

That just might be the most epic quote ever.

My Favorite Dinosaur

My favorite dinosaur, and second favorite entrepreneur (second only to Lex Luthor,) George Soros is giving a shit ton of money to the children of Harlem. 35 million dollars to be exact. The purpose of this weighty donation is that the money be used in support of low income families all over the city to pay for school supplies for the new year.

George Soros being awesome

Geroge Soros said, "Even in the toughest of economic times, starting the school year right is key to a child's success. ... When I was a student after World War II, I had no money. I received financial help, and I remember how important that was to my education."

Your the reptilian with the most Mr. Soros. Heres to you!

Tyrannosaurs in F-14s!!

Warning Volcano Eruption

Driving home tonight I saw this. Nearly pooped myself.

Michigan and Outer Drive, Dearborn, MI, 48124

Tiger Stadium

I wrote a post a long time ago about the situation of Tiger Stadium. I'm not sure that my opinion is the same as it was then, but I know that I would like to see something there. A park would be nice, or just some indication that baseball was played there for decades.

The point of writing this is mostly to call out the Detroit Free Press for misquoting someone, which led to me insulting him. I know your paper is mostly dying because of the internet, but it's this sort of ineptitude that has poisoned your name to so many people in the first place.

We here at BSD would just like to apologize for spreading the miss quote, because we know the Free Press won't.

Blog News: Apologies and Words

Wow... It's been way too long, for the blog and especially for me. We had been doing so good for a while there, but I sort of got out of the groove of posting and never got back in it. I can't promise anything, but after Spring Break where Stef and I will be heading to New York and New Jersey and once hockey season ends and I'm done broadcasting for the most part, things should really pick up. I'm not going to make any promises, but I'm going to try.

Not that BSD supports judging books by their covers, but this is a pretty cool list.

BSD on planning on saving a word, but the site doesn't seem to be working. Hopefully more will come of this later.

Googling: December

Well... things have been slow lately. My excuse is that I've had the flu, I'm not sure what Caleb's is. This month was kinda slow as far as good search terms, but it seems mostly that people who searched for stuff actually found what they were looking for. Hopefully....

"tentacle rape" derivative of the month: "tentacle rape star trek"


"? more like gay" - Um... no?

"come battere i grox in spore per il pc" - What? Is that even English? The Grox are some weird gremlin-like cyborg race in the center of the galaxy in Spore. They're evil bastards.

"how much does a blast mat cost?" - I think the real question is what is a blast mat...

"song that says motherfucker the most" - This seems like a noble project to undertake, but one that would be very time consuming. Anyone up to it? I would start with The Carpenters if I were you.

The Next Beowulf: Moby Dick

While any movie hoping to surpass the utter craptastic excellence that is Beowulf has a lot of work ahead of it, the new Moby Dick flick might just do it. Yes... I said, the new Moby Dick, because there has been like seven other adaptations according to Wikipedia. Go ahead and check them out if you want. I'm just going to make the assumption that they suck and be done with it. However, they surely don't have the level of suck that this new movie could be capable of.

They're going to turn Ahab into a good guy! How is that even possible? While, I've never read the novel, I've read enough about literature to know the guy is a nut... BSD is NEVER for making a character saner... that just doesn't make any sense. I'm sure I'll see this thing eventually, just because it's guaranteed to be hilariously bad.

Links:
Rotten Tomatoes
Film School Rejects

Literary Roundup part 3

Third verse same as the first-

In a hurry? Are Sparknotes just too time consuming for you? Than read all you need here at Book-A-Minute, the most condensed reading room on the net. Some greats are the entries for Dune, The Collected Works of H.P. Lovecraft , A Tale of Two Cities , The Collected Works of E.A. Poe and Finnegans Wake. Many of the synopses may seem cynical and overly critical of the works but it's Matt's belief and mine as well that there is no way that someone could be so precisely funny and pointed in their interpretations of these books without actually understanding and enjoying them. I guess it's all part of the fun of things.

Here's a poet I found rather interesting. His name is John Gillespie Magee, Jr. and his poem High Flight was quoted by Ronald Reagan in his speech commemorating the Space Shuttle Challenger disaster. ~

Oh! I have slipped the surly bonds of Earth
And danced the skies on laughter-silvered wings;
Sunward I’ve climbed, and joined the tumbling mirth
of sun-split clouds, — and done a hundred things
You have not dreamed of—wheeled and soared and swung
High in the sunlit silence. Hov’ring there,
I’ve chased the shouting wind along, and flung
My eager craft through footless halls of air....
Up, up the long, delirious, burning blue
I’ve topped the wind-swept heights with easy grace
Where never lark nor even eagle flew—
And, while with silent lifting mind I’ve trod
The high untrespassed sanctity of space,
Put out my hand, and touched the face of God.

Recently I read The Three Stigmata of Palmer Eldritch by Philip K. Dick. I very much enjoyed it. Of all the Dick I've read I found it the most enjoyable and the least scattering of his genius. I also recently mentioned Dick's sort story "The Electric Ant" in a post and dropped that soon in the new year Marvel will be putting out a comic based on the story- expect more on this as it develops. Further more, I'm become a real Dick head it would seem; I wrote to the PKDSociety but the P.O. Box no longer exists and my letter as returned to me stamped informing me so. If your interested in become a Dick head too look here at The Complete Stories of Philip K. Dick Vol. 5
and start using Dickian to describe things the same way others use Dickinsian.

The Ayn Rand Corner:
The new York magazine has collected some delightful excerpts from TheAtlasphere.com, an online Ayn Rand dating community. Some of my favorites are lostpainting, thustotyrants, and Lewis who says "Really, nothing is hotter than an accomplished girl in a suit, as long as she is willing to settle down and have my children."

Also on the menu is THE ABRIDGED ATLAS SHRUGGED from SpudWorks. The story succeeds as a web-lob where it failed as a novel.

Finaly for the Tolkienists and Ringers among our readers. This is a short a sweet little reading from what I can only assume was an early version The Hobbit about Bilbo's short short and sweet... well, you know. NSFW.

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

You can find the story in its entirety here.

And coming soon my review of Ezra Pound's posthumous and greatest work- Ezra Pound: Ezra Pound's Caged Wisdom.

Happy reading,
Caleb

Googling: November

Another month, another group of people of came to BSD and were disappointed. Seeing as we here at BSD want to spread happiness and good cheer this holiday season, we have answered your prayers! Thank us by coming back to read our actual articles.

"Tentacle rape" derivative of the month: "lovecraftian tentacle monster". This rape necessarily, but too good to pass up.

1. "I hate ohio" - thirteen of these this month, I really wish we could help.

2. "bsd games grue" - I found this, but I can't find Zork.

3. "'all that listening to wagner' wilde" - According to Wikiquote, Wilde uses "Wagnerian" in The Important of Being Earnest. But, I believe you want the unofficial treatment.

4. "(pennywise) it" - So this is why people are afraid of clowns.

5. "aquarium filtration systems" - I'd recommend a basic hanging filter for most people. It's a good idea to get one rated for a bigger tank than the one you have just to be safe. You can get pretty good prices on them online if you search around.

6. "calb humbert" - I think this is one of Caleb's pseudonyms.

7. "chewing the fat I smell shite" - Um... moving on.

8. "fight between edward and james" - No, Twilight fans, you do not get to refer to these characters by their first name in a Google search. BSD will not allow it!

9. "greek mythology monster with six heads and ten tentacles" - I assume you're talking about Scylla or a hydra, but neither of them had tentacles, at least how they are usually portrayed. Krakens have tentacles, but those are Norse.

10. "growing up creepy" - I think you're talking about the X-Files episode "Home".

11. "hansel and gretel" - Two children get sent into the forest because their mother is evil and their father is an idiot. They put down bread crumbs to mark their trail, proving genetics, which birds eat. They find a gingerbeard house and begin eating it. The owner, a witch, invites them inside, planning to cook them. A woodsman comes along and throws her in the oven.

12. "ice castles theme" - This looks awful, but I'm just judging by the CD cover.

13. "introduction to objectivist epistemology pamphlet" - You know, good idea. Just read this instead of Atlas Shrugged. Or... you know what? Read a real philosopher. Pick up Locke's Second Treatise on Civil Government or Adam Smith's The Wealth of Nations or better yet, go read something by John Kenneth Galbraith and discover that the only purpose in life isn't accumulating as much shit as you can. Who are you? Smaug?

14. "led zeppelin fish rape" - I swear I already talked about this, but here is the story via Snopes.

15. "mario villain reznor" - Yes! Reznor is awesome, though I'm not sure that's necessarily his name and I wouldn't call him a "villain" per se. A ferris wheel of triceratops spewing fireballs, sure, but a villain?

Reznor!

16. "ray price for the good times" - Ever heard of youtube?

17. "starwars shield robot" - That would be a Destroyer Droid, of "Where are those Droidekas?!" fame.

18. "vincent price hypnotizes" - Yes he does.

I could stare into those eyes forever